Mindset Matters.

4 Attitudes for Realizing Your Goals & Aspirations.

Motivated professionals seek DRIVEN services to ignite a personal transformation. Whether it’s succeeding in a new role, launching a new company, adopting a healthier lifestyle, communicating more effectively, managing overwhelm and uncertainty, or being more productive, change is what’s desired (and required to fulfill my mission as a coach and facilitator).

While it is true that any change requires a certain level of willpower, that commitment only takes you so far. (Think about sticking to a diet or an exercise regimen!)

No matter how failsafe the plan for evolution, the sustainable step required for enduring change relates to one’s mindset— in other words, the belief that you can change. As Henry Ford said, “If you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.” And this ties directly into my favorite definition of confidence: “a belief in one’s ability to succeed – a belief that stimulates action”.

Well, during this year of reflection, I’ve been considering clients’ successes (Talk about hits of dopamine!) I’ve also contemplated what’s gotten in the way of their triumphs. Even with sound planning and accountability arrangements, the roadblock that has prevented these clients from living the life they aspire to live sits between their ears. Their own brains betrayed them!

So, as I see it, reaching an aspiration (or not) comes down to your conviction. And if you’re in the market for a transformation and want to be buoyed by an extra helping of confidence, here are 4 attitudes that when stacked together can support you in realizing your goals and aspirations.  

Embrace a Growth Mindset. …the quintessential tool to live a fulfilled life. This mindset recognizes that we’re all capable of continuing to develop our intelligence, abilities, and talents. When we fail, we’re not failures; we get to determine how we’ll continue to improve. A Growth Mindset allows us to be adaptable and agile, vulnerable and amenable to learning from mistakes. When we’re doing anything for the first time, we’re bound to benefit from a 2.0 iteration. The Growth Mindset enables us to get back up and continue to improve after we’ve stumbled, fallen or even awkwardly staggered.

Become an ExperiMentor. Along with the Growth Mindset, another essential outlook is to actively embrace an ExperiMentor Mindset. This means that we get to ‘play’ or experiment with new ways of doing things, new practices and habits, new rituals. My ancestral philosophy is that experiments never fail; we always learn from them. This mentality takes some of the pressure off of trying new things. And when we find ways to play, we set ourselves up for greater success from a brain function perspective.

Baby Steps are BIG! When a client has declared an aspiration, and we craft an experiment to move them toward the target, I ask them to consider the smallest first action they can take to bring them one baby step closer to their goal. Often, they come back with a big step, and I challenge them to break it down into smaller steps. You see, when eager, we overestimate our ability to execute. Whether it be resources of time, money or ability, we are overly ambitious (or impatient!) Lest one gets overwhelmed with ‘too much’, it’s grounding to consider a baby step to fall back on, knowing that success, when deconstructed and distilled down, equates to one step after another.

Remember the Celebration! Celebrating every baby step is, in my estimation, the secret to successfully living a life of clarity, focus and fulfillment. In the definition of confidence shared above, celebration equates to the stimulation part. A mental fist pump or ‘rock on’ is the dopamine hit needed to keep you moving forward. In relation to Newton’s First Law of Motion, energy in motion tends to stay in motion.

These four attitudes, when combined, will provide you with the perspective to do the work for living your best life. Being human and all, these steps don’t always result in the desired transformation on the first attempt (see Growth Mindset, above). If you become stuck, here are 3 places to investigate for realigning your intention with your intended impact:

Values Alignment. Is your goal in alignment with your intrinsic values? Or are you setting goals to mollify extrinsic values? If you don’t know how to answer this question, ask yourself the following: “Why is this goal important to me?” and “What are the consequences of NOT achieving the goal?” If the answers aren’t compelling, perhaps your attention to the goal is misplaced.

The tricky part about aligning with your intrinsic values is that at times our values are in conflict with our aspirations. For example, a ‘people pleasing’ client has discovered that one of her visionary values is being an innovator. People pleasing works against this value because it’s only natural for some people to push back against change in the workplace. Since we made this conflict visible to my client, she can review and remember why being an innovator is important to her.

Resistor Mindset. This is a common progress blocker, as we humans tend to resist change. Modification and innovation can lead to inconvenience, time investment, and headaches for others that are directly or tangentially involved. That’s not to mention your own internal resistance to trying new things, reaching outside of your comfort zone, and risking embarrassment or “failure”. So, if you find yourself resisting, ask yourself what’s at the root. Is the resistance even true? What’s one thing you can do to stress test this posture?

Perfectionism. It will come as no surprise that motivated professionals with high standards often wrestle with perfectionism. It’s bittersweet to realize that people assign this word to themselves as a badge of pride. I challenge clients to lean into their perfectionism and ask themselves:

-How do I expect to grow, by reaching outside of my comfort zone, when I’m worried about being perfect?

-Is this an excuse for procrastination?

-How is my perfectionism affecting my direct reports?

You’ve now been given the tools to create the life you want. What’s stopping you from beginning your journey today?

Is Coaching for you? Are you ready for it? Sign up HERE for a 15-minute Complimentary Coaching Consult to find out.

Posted in Intentional Productivity, Leadership Development, Neuroscience, Personal Development, Resilience